Category Archives: Did You Know?

Things you may not know about APEX. Reminders and new programs.

Did You Know? About our Membership Agreements?


APEX works very hard to protect our culture and to make APEX a welcoming space regardless of your kinks, interests or identities.  As members, we are held to a higher standard of behavior than people who might meet in other situations.

Like the BDSM/Lifestyle/Kink Community, the APEX Community is made up of a wide variety of people with various education, communication, and experience levels.

While our diversity is one of our huge strengths, it can also lead to many issues in communication styles, boundaries, and levels of tolerance for conduct and behavior.

It is up to each of us to monitor our conduct and language to adhere to our membership agreements. There are lots of tools available, and they all begin with our new member orientation.

For example, below are some important things from your orientation:

  • Our orientation reminds us to mind our words. Our unsolicited opinion about other people (either positive or negative) is always inappropriate.
  • Orientation tells us how to be a non-interfering spectator.
  • Orientation helps us discover how to talk to people without accidentally being a jerk.
  • Our orientation teaches us that if someone interacts with you in a way you are not comfortable, it is your responsibility to tell them clearly and draw boundaries with which you are comfortable. It is perfectly OK to say “I am not comfortable, can we talk about something else.”, or some other similar language that draws your boundary.
  • Helps us understand what informed consent means, and makes it clear we must take responsibility to make sure our interactions with people have shared enough information so everyone is providing informed consent.
  • Orientation teaches us that “No” means “No”. If someone draws a boundary with us, it is our responsibility to respect it without question or coersion. Nothing will happen to us or with us at APEX without our consent. It is our responsibility to make sure that is true for everyone with which we interact. While “no” only means “no”, it is unequivocal and permanent. The absence of “no” does not mean “yes”…EVER.
  • Orientation tells us what to do if something you see at APEX concerns or disturbs us. We have lots of options! We can 1. Talk to the DM (at a party) or other volunteers 2. Talk to someone you are comfortable with who can explain 3. Take your opportunity to leave the room, or even the building, knowing you will always be welcomed back.
  • Each member is responsible for their own well-being. All APEX Members have “The Opportunity to Leave.” If any subject or demonstration makes someone uncomfortable, rather than stay and make others wrong, take the opportunity to leave. This may mean going outside for a few minutes, or leaving for the evening or longer. Because of the variety of subjects covered and the intensity of the subject matter, many people take the opportunity at some point or other, and are appreciated for taking personal responsibility rather than staying and making other’s feel “wrong”.
  • What consent means in our club, which is WAY more than “not touching without permission”
  • How to handle consent violations of ANY kind, because we want to address consent, EVERY TIME, with EVERY PERSON.
  • What to do when you need help to handle a situation. For example, we put up posters with our process for incident reporting. Do you remember where to find that? That process is both on the [APEX website][] or there are blank forms at the front desk and the front desk staff can help you to send it to the right people!


There are also posters up in the space with tips on How to be a non-interfering spectator, when to mind your volume, and other super useful things.

We are held accountable for our behavior at APEX.  It is important that each of us knows what is expected of us while we are at our club.

If you need a refresher, or want some help, here are some things you can do:

  • Sit down and watch orientation again! You don’t have to come to a regularly scheduled orientation, just turn on the TV and hit “play” anytime that room is not in use.
  • Talk to a member of the Executive Committee if you aren’t clear about what we all expect from one another, or have specific questions.
  • Talk to other members! Be open to feedback, and be open to providing other members with feedback. Self-policing is the how so many of us can get along in the same space. Be willing to participate in the process!

If you witness something that is contrary to how we should conduct ourselves, you are within your rights to speak up. It takes all of us to make this club the special place it is.

To support the efforts of every member, APEX will be launching “Membership” events to help everyone be more successful members.  Look for announcements about Membership 100, 200, 300 in the near future.


Did you know? APEX Supports all members of the community with Special Interest Groups


Special Interest Group (S.I.G.):

A Special Interest Group is for members of the BDSM Community who share a common interest that come together to talk, share, and support one another. Keeping with the Arizona Power Exchange mission of support, APEX provides space to these discussion groups free of charge, and membership in the club is not required.

There are currently Five (5) Special Interest Groups at APEX:

First Saturday of the Month at 3pm

Polyamory is having multiple loving relationships. Polyamory is allowing those you love to also have multiple loving relationships. Polyamory is conducting these relationships in an open, honest, ethical way.

For any and all interested in all aspects of Polyamory, join us as we learn more about polyamory, discuss topics relevant to polyamory, and meet other polyamorous people from O/our Community.

Third Sunday of the month at 11am

Calling all Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender/Transsexual, Queer & Questioning Kinky Folks! If you are seeking a group of like-minded individuals to laugh, share, and discuss the often unique challenges and joys we encounter in this lifestyle, please join us at APEX the third Sunday of the month from 11am to 1pm.

Each month we will grow and develop our community within the Community. If you identify as LGBTQ, or are a partner and friend of someone whom identifies as LGBTQ then please join us as we facilitate this Special Interest Group.

Third Wednesday of the Month at 7:15pm

This group is a discussion group for women who lead or are in charge of relationships and/or dynamics associated with the BDSM/Fetish/Kinky lifestyles.

It is for those that are genetically born female, those who identify mentally or emotionally as female and their slaves, submissives, boys, girls, pets, etc.

The group will meet monthly to support, share and discuss the successes, challenges and ideas as it relates to female led relationships or dynamics in a confidential and relaxed environment.

Fourth Wednesday of the month at 7pm

This is a discussion group for those identifying as Mistress, Maam, Mommy, Master, Top, Dom, Sir or Daddy.

For our current month topic, please keep your eyes on the APEX Group at , or on the APEX website.

We encourage the long timers and the new generation of kinksters to join us in a relaxed and confidential atmosphere for discussions about your challenges, successes and ideas.

Fourth Wednesday of the month at 7pm

A free for all discussion with the focus and attention on different topics each month.

Join us for tea and cookies and a relaxed atmosphere to engage your mind and Spirituality.

Open to subs, slaves, bottoms and those who will maintain this “sub” space during the discussions.

For our current month topic, please keep your eyes on the APEX Group at , or on the APEX website.

If you are interested in any of these discussion groups, please check our calendar for the schedule. Anyone over 18 who shares an interest with the group may attend.

If you are an APEX Member interested in facilitating a S.I.G. that is not currently represented, please email

© Copyright 2002- 2017: The Arizona Power Exchange

About APEX:

The Arizona Power Exchange (APEX) is a not-for-profit corporation that provides education, social opportunities, and support for adults who are interested in Bondage and Discipline; Dominance and Submission; and Sadomasochism (BDSM) who value individual responsibility, integrity, confidentiality, and respect for self and others. APEX provides on-going forums for education and practice of BDSM and opportunities for like-minded individuals to socialize, explore and learn in a respectful and dignified environment. APEX welcomes all sexual orientations, consensual relationships, and risk-aware BDSM and sexual practices.


Did you know…About APEX Education?


Did you know there are lots of educational programs at APEX, making up more than 200 events each year?


Monday’s: On Monday Nights (since 1997) we have some sort of Educational Event. Class, Demo, Lecture, Hands-On, Panel Discussion, Community Education, and even an occasional open house. Some of these are open to everyone over 18 because APEX feels as though Education is important for all parts of the Phoenix Community!  These educational events are generally facilitated by APEX Members, or an occasional out of town presenter. If you are interested in presenting please email:

E.D.G.E. Groups:  Extended Development, Growth, & Education (E.D.G.E.). An E.D.G.E. group is made up of APEX members who all share a common interest in learning, teaching, and developing skills. This is a peer-to-peer learning environment that facilitates practice and sharing knowledge in a particular area. There are currently 12 E.D.G.E. Groups at APEX: Safer Sex, Makers, Pets, Rope 101, Leather Care, Floggers, Impact Play, Drums, Bound to Tie, Medical Play, Presenting, and Photography.

E.D.G.E. Groups are open to all APEX members who would like to join. If you are interested in beginning an E.D.G.E. group, please e-mail

© Copyright 2011-2017: The Arizona Power Exchange

Weekend Workshops/Intensive’s: Are generally out of town presenters who do a variety of classes throughout the weekend. Sometimes it is on a single subject, sometimes it is separate classes. These are all structured differently, and attention should be paid to the schedule and pricing.  If you have a weekend workshop/intensive you would like to share with the APEX Membership please email:

Preparty Workshops: Preparty Workshops are designed to teach you some skills you can use tonight at the party! A fun and interactive environment where we can all sharpen our skills together! This is not a classroom environment-no lectures here! These are interactive and high energy sessions so you can get ready to party! You may attend the preparty workshop for an additional fee, but it is included in your party entrance fee. Like most programming Preparty Workshops are offered at no additional costs for All Access Members.

APEX 101: Skills: The APEX 101 series is an introduction to specific skills. Come learn the basics of these skills. These classes are for beginners, those new to a particular kind of play, or someone wanting a ‘sampling’ of the possibilities and intended to make you comfortable with the general premise of the chosen fetish.

The APEX 101 series is designed to be a fun and interactive environment. You will get an overview of the evening, and then you can spend your time learning about the things you are interested in! This is an opportunity to ask questions, see up close how things work and in some cases even try those things!

© Copyright 2012-2017: The Arizona Power Exchange

APEX 202: Skills: Welcome to the next phase of your evolution. You may have taken the 101, or maybe you’ve watched other people do it, or you’ve even tinkered a bit yourself.

At the  APEX 202’s you will practice a variety of techniques, and a wider exposure will allow you to take your skills to the next level! The APEX 202 series are designed to be a fun and interactive environment. You will get an overview of the evening, and then you can spend your time doing the things you are interested in! This is sometimes also an opportunity to see many different ways to do what we do, and decide which one is right for you! This is an opportunity to ask questions, see up close how things work, and most importantly, PRACTICE!

For questions please email:
© Copyright 2012-2017 : The Arizona Power Exchange

APEX 303: Skills: Continue your Education with the APEX 303’s. The APEX 303 is designed to provide an advanced education on various topic. Everyone is welcome, but often the skills are advanced and some basic knowledge is required. Each event will call out what you will want to know or possess ahead of time. For questions please email:

© Copyright 2013-2017 : The Arizona Power Exchange

Keep your eyes on our webpage,,, and for more information about the value APEX brings to our community!